“What valuable thing will I do today?”

Today, I will blossom. So that others can see me, and all that I am. Not for myself, but for bringing beauty into the lives of those I touch.

Advertisements

Learning from Gratitude: loving myself better over the past week

For the past week, i have learnt to be more confident in who I am through the practice of daily gratitude journaling. 

Has it changed me, have I learnt anything, what’s different? My perspective and self-worth has started to shift. I’m beginning to embody a more compassionate confidence towards myself, and towards others.

My biggest learning has been that there is a depth of “good stuff” within myself that i know, and also a deeper depth of which i do not know (yet). And my self developmental work would be to uncover these good qualities, and strengthen them through appropriate expression across all my life experiences and my interactions with other people.

I have also learnt that showing gratitude for myself has forced me to be more gentle with myself, throw more of my self-judgments away, and adopt a more accepting mindset that seeks to highlight what was good, and what was worthy of growth for me.

Gratitude might be a key to developing a developmental strengths-based perspective: a growth mindset.

I have also learnt that the practice of gratitude for myself has budded into gratitude for other people – my family, friends, loved ones, acquaintances, and even colleagues (some are difficult to deal with, but i’m getting there! Lol).

Being thankful for all the big and small things about myself made me more sensitive and attuned to those noticing those in others as well. It made me more inclined to be thankful for their stuff (good and good for growth), and really appreciate that we meet them just as we are and where they are at.

In honoring and closing the 7 day gratitude-for-self challenge, I am very thankful for Doreen that provided me the space to birth this interesting solution from our coaching. I am thankful also for everyone who has been supportive in me being me. 

The past week has been growing on me, and I look forward to starting a new challenge soon, in continuing my writing and journaling. As I continue to practice self-gratitude, my hope is that we all invoke more thankfulness in our everyday lives. This is really cliché, but there really is much to be grateful for.

Grateful-for-Myself Journal: Day 7

Today marks the end of my 7 day challenge. And there are so many things i’d like to be showing my gratitude for; and my thoughts are literally all over the place.

Breathe in, breathe out….

Today, I am grateful for:

  • Being present to my not-being-present in the mornings, as I rush from home to office. I notice where my attention goes naturally, and it allows me the opening to redirect my attention gently. Doesnt seem to work all the time, but its a practice i guess. #humanatwork
  • Choosing to listen to an old Westlife album of beautiful ballads. I believe every one has a love song hidden away in their hearts, we just need to find some way of singing it and sharing it with others.
  • Hustling and activating productivity at work through juggling multiple important tasks, and getting through it all in great progress. Felt very energized by all of it, and couple of learnings along the way.
  • Being irritated and pissed off at a potential client who turned into a client by showing up at today’s workshop, even tho we didn’t confirm her place. Thankful for the shock, the rage and emotions, and being able to attend to her needs above-all.
  • Showing kindness to a friend, who was edging me with her sarcasm. The people who need kindness most are often the most difficult ones to give it to. Working and throwing the ego aside, so that I can help make this world kinder, and better.
  • Showing faith in the goodness of a fellow colleague, and seeing her strength and her growth before she could see it herself.
  • My dream of inspiring change, and how everyday i get to do that. Some days i do more, some less, but everyday, i try, and i do.
  • Holding nonjudgmental space for a friend who was falling apart. I cant fix her, but I can be there and show my support for her. I cannot help her, but i can listen and be there as her friend.
  • Getting unhappy with my parents, feeling that they are not helpful. What i learn out of this is that, I am not helping them. What i see in others, is a projection of what i am experiencing currently. It has given me an opportunity to change.
  • Sitting down at the end of the day and penning this gratitude note. Taking time out to give thanks to Life itself for gracing me with so many gifts.

Tomorrow, I will continue to write, in honoring the past 7 days and sharing some of my learnings and my moments of mini growth. 

Grateful-for-Myself Journal: Day 6

Almost running to the end of my 7 day challenge. So many thoughts I want to put together tomorrow, its been stewing and bubbling…

Today, I am grateful for:

  • Being a leprechaun for the office halloween party. I gave myself permission to play, i told myself its okay to feel scared when i throw myself out there into the mix of people and just go crazy. Yes my costume was perhaps not the best, but there was still plenty of screaming, laughing, joking, smiles and photo-taking. I had a blast! #ianstpatricks
  • Accepting and showing thankfulness for the new laptop that has been graced to me.
  • Practicing and strengthening my resolve – i did not cave in and buy packets of snacks that i would gorge myself on and feel guilty after. My will is strong

Tomorrow, i look forward to connecting with many new clients and partners at work. Its the start of a beautiful journey with them, and I’m looking forward. And yes, honoring and closing this small lil challenge to myself.

Grateful-for-Myself Journal: Day 5

Life will throw things at you, but only those you are able to work with. There’s always room for growth and to learn.

Today, I am grateful for:

  • Stepping into my fear of networking, making the first steps and getting to speak to 3 persons during a short networking event. My fears own me only to the extent I let it to.
  • Being honest and candid and open with my colleagues. Sharing with them what i really thought and felt, and was ready to let it go if they didnt want it. No judgment, no acting from fear or inadequacy. Just being myself, and it felt liberating.
  • Choosing kindness in interacting with Shah over my spoilt laptop. Being more aggressive or frustrated wouldnt have helped things. So breathing in the moment, and then discharging my unhappiness afterwards, so that he is not affected by me. This way, i got to maintain relationships at work.

And i’m learning the lesson again today, that things that irritate the hell out of you actually reveal a part of you that needs attention and healing. No biggie, just love and learn and growing into a better person.

Grateful-for-Myself Journal: Day 4

I’m onto day 4, and i half-feel that the novelty of journaling on gratitude is waning. But i am pressing on, because i want to show myself how thankful i am for whatever arose today.

While a lot of crap arose, today, I am grateful for:

  • Choosing to look at challenges as opportunities and possibilities. So often we get drawn into our ‘story’ where we feel so many things are stacked against us, and happening to us. Today, i’m choosing (yet again) to happen to these things, to own the crap that’s arising, and to act towards a better tomorrow.
  • Growing and developing my ability for influencing others. I started the day with a 3 hour meeting. Sure, it over-ran. But, i met my objectives, and we all came away feeling clear on next steps, and best of all aligned. Glad I was able to support the perspective broadening of my work partner.
  • Spending a great evening with two of my besties. Hearing them, being able to support them (always) through our friendship. Choo and Wayne, thank you for our many heart-to-heart’s, and i’m deeply moved to continue to be here as your friend. May we continue to grow in all of our experiences of Life.

Today gratitude feels normal, and that’s okay too 🙂

Grateful-for-Myself Journal: Day 3

Happy Monday. Started to realize that I do look forward to a brand new week. There is still a sense of slight inertia, of wanting to stay at the restful weekend, but more so, I feel excited to take on the week ahead. So i guess thats my first thankfulness!

Today, I am grateful for:

  • Welcoming Mondays. They represent a new week, a new start, a chance to do something good during the week. An opportunity in Mondays
  • Not asking for permission when I need to leave work early, and simply managing my time and my work. I feel like there is a growth in my level of ownership with work – when i do not have to answer to people, or ask “can i?”, and rather just doing things that seem right anyway
  • Showing up to my friend’s photo exhibition. I witnessed her growth and transformation in sharing what she believes is beautiful in the form of pictures. Deeply inspiring and humbling. A great honour. Very thankful for being able to walk this journey with her, acknowledge her, and champion her

Today someone (Ming Kwang) told me, that he’s looking forward to my growth that he’s already seeing take place, and that my work sounds fun, exciting and meaningful. 

And also, during work, my boss (Edvan) said that i should cut myself some slack, and stop putting myself down so much. He mentioned for me to start seeing my strengths as strengths, and be willing to grow them.

I feel seen, and even more willing to expand, stretch my being, and grow. Thank you, my friends.

Gratitude feels good.

Grateful-for-Myself Journal: Day 2

It was a good sunday. Lots of rest, quiet time, play, and being with family. A great close to the week 😀

Today, I am grateful for:

  • Allowing myself to rest – sleeping in and waking up naturally (without any alarms or calls), and not feeling any sense of guilt. Sometimes, sufficient rest comes as an indulgence. And i’m thankful for being able to indulge myself in rest today.
  • Allowing myself to be as I want to – quiet time reading at a busy starbucks, starting a new pokemon game (i wanted to for a long while).
  • Allowing myself to be in the company of my family – holding (non judgmental) space for mum to give out about her work place, practicing patience towards my brother when he was late, and enjoying a lovely curry dinner with the family.

Sunday is a great day. Now, i’m grateful for the lil drinky that i’ve poured for myself. Savoring a nip of Nikka12. Looking forward to the week ahead

Grateful-for-Myself Journal: Day 1

So today I was given the gift of coaching with a dear friend, Doreen. Being her client, I took the chance to explore how to better connect within my friendships and relationships with others.

And out of the coaching conversation, blossomed the need for me to be more transparent in exposure to others, through being thankful for myself. Hence a 7 day gratitude challenge – including also the nice things people say about me, to me, so I start to believe the voice inside that says “I am enough, and I am great.”

So today, I am grateful for:

  • Being able to explore my relationships-style with others, and discovering that I can make a difference to how I can better show up in them.
  • Being open to showing more gratitude and appreciation for myself through journaling and noticing the ‘good stuff’ as reflected through others
  • Sharing in an afternoon of too much eating, some shopping and strolling with my best friend, Jireh. Very happy that we spend so much time together, and that I am slowly bringing down the barriers in how I communicate with him

And today, Doreen also shared that I’m a great person. So honoured to hear that out of everyone in the class, she picked me! Very thankful for being able to be her practice client. And looking forward to blessing her journey ahead – may it be bumpy (so that she gets all the experiences she needs), and may she grow gracefully!

Self-love, Day 1.